Pls read my story? every1 says its crap - am i a good writer?

The amazing sights that befell upon them that morning took her breath away. The lions they saw, the cheetah’s lazing in the morning sun, the sheer joy of seeing elephants in the sunrise walking in procession, each holding the tail of their comrade for guidance against the already tyrannical heat. They had started out early. Earlier than Jessie had ever been up in her life and after a hasty breakfast of ham and eggs, they started on their journey. Jessie did find herself wondering, judging by the moth eaten truck they got collected in how on earth they were going to be able to survive the day. The truck limped into the camp at 4:30 in the morning travelling about one mile per hour and had the appearance of an aged dog that had just been told it was to be put out of his misery. After checking the wheels, the tyres and the radiator was all functioning, Jessie climbed up the side of the truck and found what she felt, was a comfortable enough position where she felt she could catch a few more minutes of sleep as she felt being up this early was seriously not good for a person’s health. After an hour of driving along the bumpy dirt track road, she realised sleep was not an optional extra, her head constantly colliding with the roof, Jessie was ready to give up and go home when Jack suddenly grabbed her arm and shouted “Look Jess!” As her eyes swam back into focus from the latest roof collision, she saw the most amazing sight ever to behold her. The great African plain was alive with lions, zebra, Antelope, Giraffe’s. Everywhere she looked there were animals, all shapes and sizes, all the colours of the rainbow. It was such a beautiful sight, she felt like crying. The sun had not totally risen yet and the shapes of the animals were making magnificent silhouettes against the Orange sunrise. “Oh my god” she whispered letting her breath out in one go unaware that she had been holding it in. “Yep I did warn you didn’t I?” said Jack laughing at the amazed look on her face.